Is Modern Dating a Nightmare for Men? It's Time to Talk About Women's Role and How to Fix It.

Is Modern Dating a Nightmare for Men? It's Time to Talk About Women's Role and How to Fix It.

Let's be brutally honest: the modern dating scene isn't just a challenge; it's a flaming dumpster fire, and women's behavior and expectations are often fueling the blaze. If you're a man feeling like a walking ATM, constantly rejected by "princesses," or afraid to even approach a woman, you're not alone. A significant societal shift is underway, with 63% of men under 30 in the U.S. opting to stay single – a notable increase from 2019. This isn't a victimless trend; it's a crisis with far-reaching implications, creating loneliness for everyone.

My book, "Dating Sucks: The Brutal Truth About Modern Romance," doesn't sugarcoat the chaos. It tackles the unspoken truths head-on, offering a game plan for both men and women to navigate this mess, and yes, it calls out the BS on all sides, especially when it comes to women's unrealistic expectations and lack of accountability.

The Harsh Truth: Why Women Are a Major Source of Modern Dating Problems

For many men, the current dating landscape feels like a rigged game where they are constantly undervalued, financially exploited, and met with disdain.

• The Financial Burden: Men as "Walking ATMs"

◦ Despite women earning their own income, a pervasive expectation lingers that men should cover all dating expenses. A 2023 study found men covered 68% of dating expenses on average, with little change in 2025 data.

◦ This isn't just about dates; some women escalate to expecting men to fund their entire lifestyle, including manicures, hair styling, cosmetics, clothes, rent, utilities, and even car payments. This behavior leads to men feeling like "ATMs" rather than partners, sparking significant resentment.

◦ Social media often normalizes "nails and vibes" costs as a reason for women to avoid contributing, further straining men's finances, especially when men can spend upwards of $200 on a first date only to be ghosted.

◦ Even "fake offers" to pay by women are often seen through by men, causing further resentment.

• Unrealistic Expectations and "Princess" Mentality

◦ Many women, influenced by social media and "Disney prince charming" narratives, hold "absurd and delusional standards" for men. They often expect an "Omni-man"—a perfect partner who simply doesn't exist outside their heads.

◦ This leads to "average women reject[ing] average men, perpetuating loneliness". Studies indicate a majority of women on platforms like Bumble set height preferences for men at 6'6" or above, creating an "astronomically small" dating pool for their preferences.

◦ The "Chad Chase" phenomenon sees women focusing overwhelmingly on the top 1-5% of men (those who are ripped, rich, or charming), while ignoring "average Joes who'd worship the ground they walk on". This often results in women being disrespected, ghosted, or shamed by these "elite guys".

• Lack of Accountability & Disrespect Towards Men

◦ Many women "dodge accountability like it’s a communicable disease". They are 40% less likely than men to apologize for flaking or abrupt endings, a trend that is worsening.

◦ Ghosting has become a "coward's exit strategy," leaving men feeling betrayed and insecure without closure.

◦ Men are increasingly hesitant to approach women in person due to the fear of being perceived as "creepy" or facing "Me Too" accusations, often fueled by social media shaming. This discourages men from taking risks, leading many to "stop approaching, to stop talking to women, to taking risks".

◦ The normalization of blanket man-bashing ("men are pigs," "trash") on social media is morally equivalent to racism and erodes trust, making men wary of approaching at all.

• The Marriage Trap and Declining Value

◦ For men, marriage has become a "loaded gamble". Women initiate 66-70% of divorces (up to 90% among college-educated women).

◦ Divorce laws often skew in favor of women, impacting assets, alimony (even if she's employed), and child custody, with men paying 97% of child support in the U.S. and women controlling custody in 80% of cases. This effectively turns fathers into "ATMs with limited access" to their children.

◦ This, combined with women's "dating value peak[ing] early," means men often weigh the "liability against commitment," leading many to delay or avoid marriage entirely. Paternity risks are also a concern, with men increasingly demanding DNA tests.

◦ Sex work, such as on OnlyFans, is also a significant dealbreaker, with 72% of men viewing it as a dealbreaker for long-term relationships, as men crave exclusivity.

Men Are Opting Out – And It's Time for Women to Step Up

These factors contribute to a growing trend of male dating reluctance. Men are tired of being treated like an endless resource or subjected to a game where the rules are constantly stacked against them. Many are simply choosing to "go their own way" (MGTOW) for peace.

But this isn't just about men. Women are also caught in this "dumpster fire," experiencing catfishing, ghosting, situationships, and the emotional toll of unrealistic expectations. Loneliness is a "scam" that impacts over 40% of adults, affecting everyone regardless of gender. The system is rigged to keep you scrolling, isolated, and unhappy.

Your Game Plan: "Dating Sucks: The Brutal Truth About Modern Romance"

This book isn't about blaming; it's about providing solutions and encouraging both men and women to change their approach to dating. "Dating Sucks: The Brutal Truth About Modern Romance" by Dave Alto, Ph.D., is your snarky, no-BS guide to surviving the dating jungle for everyone.

This book directly addresses the issues raised above, offering a clear path forward:

• For Women: Take Accountability and Be Realistic. My book provides 30 practical playbooks to help women "yeet the creeps, dodge freeloaders, and maybe—just maybe—find that long-lasting love". It specifically delves into:

◦ "The Unspoken Truth: Women, Expectations, and the Dating Imbalance" (Chapter 31). This chapter is a "warning: this one's gonna sting," directly addressing how "a lot of the dysfunction in today’s dating world stems from women’s behavior, expectations, and a system that enables imbalance".

◦ Ditching the "Entitlement Trap": Learn to "split the bill and ditch outdated dating rules," rejecting the "men pay for everything" mentality. Women are encouraged to offer to split early and alternate paying to foster respect and equality.

◦ Getting Realistic About Your "League" and Making the First Move: Stop the "Chad Chase" and unrealistic standards that leave women lonely and men overlooked. Women are taught to "make the first move" and "stop the creep-shaming" to create a more balanced dating dynamic.

◦ Owning Your Choices: The book covers "how your choices tank (or boost) your dating game," from sexual history to online behavior, emphasizing accountability.

• For Men: Understand the Dynamics and Set Boundaries. The book also equips men with the tools to navigate this challenging landscape by:

◦ Understanding the sources of women's "delusional standards" and entitlement.

◦ Strategies to address the unspoken truths about dating imbalances.

◦ Guidance on setting boundaries, identifying red flags, and avoiding being treated as a "walking ATM".

◦ Tools to rebuild trust after dating disasters and avoid the "loneliness scam".

This book isn't about being "woke" or "anti-man"; it's about cutting through the noise and calling out the truth, enabling both genders to "meet halfway" and build genuine connections. It provides "30 practical playbooks" and "brutal honesty" to help you "swipe smarter, love better, and maybe even find your forever match—without losing your sanity or your savings".

It's time to stop letting modern romance defeat you. Dave Alto's "Dating Sucks" helps you "dissect the carnage, laugh at the absurdity, and maybe—maybe—figure out how to survive without losing your sanity or your data plan".

Ready to reclaim your love life by understanding the brutal truths and implementing a real game plan?

Order "Dating Sucks: The Brutal Truth About Modern Romance" now and learn how to swipe smarter, love better, and finally win at the game of modern love!