The Brutal Truth: Are Women Sabotaging Modern Romance?

The Brutal Truth: Are Women Sabotaging Modern Romance? Your "Body Count" and Entitlement Are Turning Men Off.

Let's cut the pleasantries and get straight to the point: the modern dating scene is a "flaming dumpster fire", and it's time to acknowledge the uncomfortable truth that women's behavior, inflated expectations, and lack of accountability are major contributors to the inferno. If you're a woman wondering where all the "good men" have gone, or a man feeling like a walking ATM constantly navigating unrealistic demands, my book, "Dating Sucks: The Brutal Truth About Modern Romance," lays it all bare. It's time for a reality check, because men have standards too, and many women are consistently failing to meet them for serious relationships.

The numbers don't lie: a significant societal shift is underway, with 63% of men under 30 in the U.S. opting to stay single – a notable increase from 2019. This "growing trend of male dating reluctance" isn't a coincidence; it's a direct response to a dating landscape that men increasingly view as rigged against them.

The Unspoken Truth: How Women's Choices Drive Men Away from Commitment

My book, "Dating Sucks: The Brutal Truth About Modern Romance," particularly Chapter 31, "The Unspoken Truth: Women, Expectations, and the Dating Imbalance", directly addresses how "a lot of the dysfunction in today’s dating world stems from women’s behavior, expectations, and a system that enables imbalance". Here’s a look at the brutal facts:

• The "Body Count" Conundrum: Men's Standards for Long-Term Love

◦ For men, a woman's promiscuity or "high body count" (number of sexual partners) is a "massive red flag for men eyeing long-term relationships". This is a standard men hold, and pretending it doesn't exist won't make it go away.

◦ 65% of men prefer partners with fewer than 10 lovers, with an "ideal" of 4-5 partners for serious commitment.

◦ This isn't "slut-shaming"; it's men setting boundaries based on their preferences for fidelity and stability. Men value exclusivity partly due to paternity risks, and a history of numerous hookups can signal impulsivity or a low commitment threshold.

◦ When women offer "little beyond gatekeeping sex," men learn to "take what’s offered casually and bail on commitment". This means women who engage in frequent casual sex often find themselves "used" for easy sex and then "dumped" when men seek a partner for a serious relationship.

◦ Sex work, such as on OnlyFans or streaming, "nukes long-term prospects" for women because men crave exclusivity, not a public archive. 72% of men view it as a dealbreaker.

• The Marriage Trap: Why Men Are Opting Out

◦ Marriage has become a "loaded gamble" for men. Women initiate 66-70% of divorces, rising to 90% among college-educated women.

◦ Divorce laws often skew in favor of women, impacting assets, retirement, alimony (even if she's employed), and child custody, with men paying 97% of child support in the U.S. and women controlling custody in 80% of cases. This effectively turns fathers into "ATMs with limited access" to their children.

◦ Concerns about paternity fraud are also real, with 25% of paternity tests in tested cases showing negative results. Men demanding DNA tests are making a smart move to avoid a "lifelong financial trap," and pushback from women, labeling it "distrust," ignores men's vulnerability.

◦ Given these risks, many professional men delay marriage, and men are increasingly "bailing" on marriage.

• The Financial Burden: Men as "Walking ATMs"

◦ Despite women earning their own income, a pervasive expectation lingers that men should cover "everything: dinner, drinks, entertainment, transportation, even gifts" on dates. This leads to men feeling like "ATMs" rather than partners, sparking significant resentment.

◦ A 2023 study found men covered 68% of dating expenses on average, with women contributing only 12%. This trend showed little change in 2025 data.

◦ Some women escalate to expecting men to fund their entire lifestyle, including manicures, hair styling, cosmetics, clothes, rent, utilities, and even car payments. Social media often normalizes "nails and vibes" costs as a reason for women to avoid contributing.

◦ Even "fake offers" to pay by women are often seen through by men, causing further resentment.

◦ Why should men "bleed cash in a game rigged against them" when the return is often rejection or exploitation? This is why many are opting out.

• Unrealistic Expectations and the "Princess" Mentality

◦ Many women, heavily influenced by social media and "Disney prince charming" narratives, hold "absurd and delusional standards" for men. They often expect an "Omni-man"—a perfect partner who simply doesn't exist.

◦ Studies have shown that women on dating apps often rate 80% of men as "below average" in attractiveness, with a median rating of 2 out of 7, creating an "astronomically small" dating pool for their preferences. This leads to "average women reject[ing] average men, perpetuating loneliness".

◦ This "Chad Chase" phenomenon sees women focusing overwhelmingly on the top 1-5% of men, who often disrespect, ghost, or shame them on social media.

◦ Yet, these same women often ignore "average Joes who’d worship the ground they walk on". This entitlement makes men feel that women demand the world while offering little in return.

• Lack of Accountability and Disrespect Towards Men

◦ Many women "dodge accountability like it’s a communicable disease". They are 40% less likely than men to apologize for flaking or abrupt endings, a trend that is worsening.

◦ Ghosting has become a prevalent "coward's exit strategy", leaving men without closure and feeling betrayed.

◦ The normalization of "blanket man-bashing" ("men are pigs," "trash") on social media is morally equivalent to racism and erodes trust, making men wary of approaching at all.

◦ Men are increasingly hesitant to approach women in person due to the fear of being perceived as "creepy" or facing "Me Too" accusations. This discourages men from taking risks, leading many to "stop approaching, to stop talking to women, to taking risks".

The Call to Action: It's Time for Women to Step Up

The reality is that men are opting out. They are tired of being treated like an endless resource, financially exploited, disrespected, and subjected to a dating game where the rules are constantly stacked against them. Many are simply choosing to "go their own way" for peace and self-preservation.

But this isn't a one-sided problem. Loneliness is a "scam" that impacts over 40% of adults, affecting everyone regardless of gender. The current "dumpster fire" of modern romance is designed to keep you scrolling, isolated, and unhappy.

"Dating Sucks: The Brutal Truth About Modern Romance" by Dave Alto, Ph.D., is your "snarky, no-BS guide to surviving the dating jungle". It directly confronts these uncomfortable truths and provides practical solutions:

• For Women: Take Accountability and Be Realistic. My book contains "30 practical playbooks" designed to help women:

◦ Ditch the "Entitlement Trap": Learn to "split the bill and ditch outdated dating rules," rejecting the "men pay for everything" mentality. Women are encouraged to offer to split early and alternate paying to foster respect and equality.

◦ Get Realistic About Your "League" and Make the First Move: Stop the "Chad Chase" and the unrealistic standards that leave you lonely. Women are taught to "make the first move" and "stop the creep-shaming" to create a more balanced dating dynamic.

◦ Own Your Choices: The book emphasizes how your choices tank (or boost) your dating game, from sexual history and online behavior to taking accountability for flaking or disrespect.

This book is about cutting through the noise and calling out the truth, enabling both genders to "meet halfway" and build genuine connections. It offers "brutal honesty" and a "game plan" to help you "swipe smarter, love better, and maybe even find your forever match—without losing your sanity or your savings".

Ready to reclaim your love life by understanding the brutal truths and implementing a real game plan?

Order "Dating Sucks: The Brutal Truth About Modern Romance" now and learn how to swipe smarter, love better, and finally win at the game of modern love!